The greatest joy you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
You will recall my last blog focused on the importance of finding your gift and giving it away as an act of love. In the intervening period I have received a few reality checks, I presume to set me up for this discussion on feelings.
Put your own oxygen mask on first!
Lately I have been feeling underappreciated, know how that feels? The truth is this feeling is mine, no one can make me or you feel anything. Nor can they change the way we feel. That power is exclusively ours. This begs the questions, why do I feel underappreciated and what should I do about it?
To answer these questions with any accuracy I need to become my own observer a fundamental skill of Living Consciously. I also need a strong dose of courage and honesty without which my mind is perfectly capable of taking me to a completely different destination than the conclusion I need to arrive at.
What is going on?
What is going on in my life that provides for me to “feel” underappreciated. Actually it is nothing particularly dramatic, just business as usual. Then the “ah ha” moment, it’s that time of the year again!
The time of the year when we are all exhausted. When it has been a long time since we last took a break. That time of the year when your kids are “done” with school! Well and truly done to the point they just want to blob and forget about the place for the summer! And what’s worse THEY ARE AT HOME and it’s only a matter of time before you hear the words “Can I” and/or “I’m bored”.
Oh, and joyous joy upon joy it’s Christmas! Now the heat is on who’s going to who’s when and what do we bring? Who is giving who what? And how are we supposed to pay for all this, we don’t all have endless money! The shopping centres are jam packed and the delivery vans are running 7 days a week!
NOBODY HAS THE TIME OR ENERGY TO APPRECIATE ANYONE! It’s survival time. Well that is the excuse isn’t it? Not good enough really, but having said that it is the season to be forgiving, for all the reasons listed above.
Getting back to my own emotional crisis. The solution is to appreciate myself. To love myself the way I would like others to love me. That sounds pretty straight forward but for me it is revolutionary. Say What! I should love me the way I want others to love me.
The truth is others are taking their cue on how to treat you from you! If you do not show the love you have for yourself in the actions you take why would anyone else do anything different?
Remember we are all self-absorbed and, at this time of year, rundown and very busy. There is an old saying the “squeaky wheel gets the oil”. If you want to be appreciated then appreciate yourself and don’t just pay lip service! Take Action to show yourself love and respect. Squeak!
Don’t be a self-serving tyrant
If all you do is serve yourself then it is clear you do not love yourself. Why would you deny someone you love the greatest joy of all? There is a world of difference between a narcissist and a human that loves and looks after themselves the way they love and look after others. Be that person and see what comes into your life.
If you want to explore “you” and work out what’s getting in between you and the life you want to live, click in the link below and try out mini master class in Living Consciously free of charge or obligation.